Persuasive Writing Self Evaluation

Surface Features- Great
Because there is no spelling or punctuation mistakes

Deeper Features- Good
Because my ideas are great and my sentances make sense. There is a couple of ideas in a parahgraph

Title & Intro- Good
The title describes the purpose of the writing.
The introduction has a hook that captures the audiences attention and makes them want to carry on reading

Organisation of the writing- Good
The hook captures the audiences attention so the reader reads on. The arguments are strong but could be stronger. The summary is good and it wraps the writing up.

Strength of Argument- Good
I am only writing about the topic. Most of the facts are true

Publication- Great
Because I have photos and a title that stands out from the writing

Why the England Referee was unfair


By Elise
Team 14, Fendalton School
October 2007

When the All Blacks lost to France in the Rugby World Cup quarterfinal the New Zealand supporters were watching in shock as the French celebrated. The players, supporters and coaches were all gutted and disappointed with our loss. No other country would have been as disappointed as we were. This is the earliest the All Blacks have ever been out of the Rugby World Cup.

I think the England referee was unfair because he was on the side of the French team so that the English team would get to play an easier team in the semi-final.
In the first half Luke Macalister got sent off for 10 minutes for what looked like a high tackle but wasn't. The referee was definitely on the French side because a fair referee wouldn't pull up one side for nothing.

During the second half the referee didn't see a forward pass from the French that scored a try, which was also converted. If the referee had seen this forward pass, then the All Blacks would have won and had a chance of getting through to the finals.

Everybody is blaming the loss all on the All blacks and the coaches but it was partly the All blacks bad team work but most of it was unfair refereeing. The final score was 18-20 to France. The All Blacks now have to wait another 4 years to have another try at getting the title of the Rugby World Cup. All we can do now is hope that the refereeing is fair unlike this year’s quarterfinal.

Permission for Image use

Hi my name is Elise and I am from Fendalton School in New Zealand. I am 10 years old and Year 6.

This term for inquiry we are making people aware about Global Warming - what it is and what will happen if we don't make a change now. Could I please use this image below for my Inquiry? I will be sure that it will have your website address on it so people will know where I got this great image from. Could you please email me with your answer at elise.batt@fendalton.school.nz My teacher email address is rob.clarke@fendalton.school.nz
Here is the Image I am wanting to use:

Abseiling letter

Dear Blue Skies Abseiling & Rock Climbing Team,

Thankyou very much for instructing us on the rock climbing wall and the abseiling tower.
It was lots of fun trying things that we don't usually do. I can't wait to go abseiling again. When we went on the 8m tower for the fist time I was really freaked but going down on the secound and third time it wasn't as scary. Going down the16m tower was very scary on your first time. Going down backwards was even more scary.

We hope that you have a great time going Abseiling down the 100m cliff face.We all had a great experience and wish you luck for future abseiling.

I am sure that anyone else that has been abseiling or rock climbing with you had a great time. We hope you enjoyed the BBQ dinner we provided you.

Thanks Again

Elise Batt
On behalf of Room 14 Fendalton School

Here is a podcast thanking you...

Gymnastics

This is my Gymnastics Certificate from Christchurch School of Gymnastics. My Favourite part of Gym was the Trampoline and Pit.

Key Competency Reflection 2007

Attributes I have shown progress in

• Technology - I think I have improved in technolgy this year because I have been a Tech Wizard and learnt things from other tech wizards.

• Active listening- I think I have improved heaps in listening because now I am listening and then asking questions if I need to. I am also respecting others more than I used to.

• Goal Setter- I think got better in goal setting and achieving the goals I know this because I have set lots of goals and I have improved heaps in the areas. Like my active listening goal.

• Respects- I think I have improved in this area because I have been listening and respecting others more when they are talking

• Reflects-I think I have improved in reflecting because I am doing quality reflections for my goals and things I have learnt.

Attributes I am still working on

• Self motivated- I think I have got better in this but still need a bit more work because I give up sometimes when things are getting to hard.
  
• Can put things into practice- I think that I am quite good at this because most of my goals that I set have been achieved.
  
• Maths- I think I have improved heaps in Maths because now I am understanding things better than I was.
• Contributes- I think I have improved in this but still need a bit more work because I give ideas most of the time but some of the time the ideas are a bit silly.